Today is the anniversary of us starting our adoption paperwork!! It was on this day last year that we mailed off our preliminary packet to be initially approved for adoption through Bethany. What a year we have been through. So much has happened, both good and bad. If I had to pick a top in both category it would be: 1-GOOD. We are so much stronger and we both feel that we are being prepared for things to come. God has stretched, molded, flattened, filled up our hearts this past year and we are headed to the mountaintop! 1-BAD. We haven't been selected by a birth parent yet.
As the new Third Day song says: "I need a miracle"
Monday, December 24, 2012
Thursday, November 29, 2012
3/5 of FAITH is WAIT
Another part of our story, who knows what chapter we are on:
Back on the 13th, we got a message on our web portal about a potential birthparent placement that they were asking waiting families to pray about and consider if we wanted to be shown to this couple. It caught my eye because they don't let us know about being shown to a couple. As I read the case, I was taken back as I noted each sentence and planted it into my heart. Out of respect, I won't go into a lot of details, but basically the first paragraph was the "ideal" baby. Two parents who were supportive of adoption, healthy, under prenatal care, no drug/alcohol/tobacco use, a girl :), Caucasian....I could go on. Oh, and she is due at the end of January! When I read the second paragraph, that is where the case got interesting. Apparently their was going to be a big sum of birthparent pass through expenses...about $20,000. WOW~and this would be in addition to the amount already due at placement. Cha-Ching. I mean, CHA-CHING! Such a blow. They were asking us (waiting faimilies) to prayerfully consider if we want to be shown to this couple and to let our case worker know by 11/26. Ty and I discussed it and we were so torn because we wanted to go for it, but the dollar signs are soemthing that we don't have. I don't even know who has that kind of cash. (If you do, please consider helping me out!)
After much prayer and even getting some prayer warriors involved, we wanted to go for it, and I really bad. I understood Ty's point because he said that he didn't want to go in debt, but I just couldn't think about passing up this "free" to at least go for it mind set. If we weren't selected, then that would be a closed door for sure. You see, we are children of God and serve a mighty, powerful Father who can move mountains and make miracles happen. Over the weekend we had prayerfully decided to go for this couple and have our profile book shown.
I didn't get a chance to call my Social Worker until the 21st. I emailed and sent a message to her on our portal and it kicked a message to me saying that she was out of town for Thanksgiving. Strike One. Then I called the Charlotte office and nobody answered so I left a message. Strike Two. A little while later, the precious adoption counselor called me and I loved our conversation. She said that this is part of the journey and H-U-G-E leaps of faith. Sometimes she said that you just have to jump. We were told that we couldn't ask any questions...but we did talk further about the case and she said that the BM was out of a different branch and that they didn't have a lot of profiles to show because of the extra money involved. That gave us a great hope. The counselor also said that it is possible that the cost wouldn't be that high if she was able to get things worked out. Was that a sign that God had already provided for us? She said that she would call the branch right now, done.
Over the remainder of the week, we were hopeful, scared, excited, and nervous. I would be lying if I said that I didn't look up how many weeks the BM was, thinking about "pink" things, and finally getting to say that we were placed. Also, she would get to wear my cousin Alli's hand-me-downs, and mom is set on the fact that she is going to have one of each grandchild. (Remember that my brother and his wife are due in May~and we all think that it is a boy.) It is a really freaky feeling to know that someone was going to be digging into our lives and deciding if we were "perfect" to them to raise their child. On Monday, I got some text messages curious to know if we had heard anything. I love my prayer warriors/family/friends.
I always keep my cell phone on my desk this year, you know, just in case. I checked my phone after lunch today and I saw that I had a message on my portal. I read that the BM looked at profiles yesterday and selected an adoptive couple, and they had already been notified. Reject, defeat, disappointment, sad. However, I had 22 first graders who need me to be on my toes and teach them to the best of my ability. One sweetheart waved her hand in front of me shortly after I read the message, because I was staring into space. Focus, Molli. I made it to the end of the day, and I was so proud because I haven't shed ONE tear! Yay, me. I called Ty and messaged a few family/friends. I love their kind words of encouragement. I stayed at school tonight until 6:10 and that helped too, I think. Ty and I went out to dinner and we talked about how we were sad, but yet glad to not have to get a loan for the pass through expenses.
As I have been taught: "God is either protecting you, or saving you for something better." I love my mom.
Maybe this chapter is turning into its own novel, sorry.
Mom called and said "we didn't nickname this baby Miracle for nothing" and I totally agree. That made me totally smile from ear to ear. We have to keep waiting on our Miracle to come from above. We have already waited eight years, officially in adoption world for almost a year, and we will continually wait and be so forever grateful for His blessing to our family.
Back on the 13th, we got a message on our web portal about a potential birthparent placement that they were asking waiting families to pray about and consider if we wanted to be shown to this couple. It caught my eye because they don't let us know about being shown to a couple. As I read the case, I was taken back as I noted each sentence and planted it into my heart. Out of respect, I won't go into a lot of details, but basically the first paragraph was the "ideal" baby. Two parents who were supportive of adoption, healthy, under prenatal care, no drug/alcohol/tobacco use, a girl :), Caucasian....I could go on. Oh, and she is due at the end of January! When I read the second paragraph, that is where the case got interesting. Apparently their was going to be a big sum of birthparent pass through expenses...about $20,000. WOW~and this would be in addition to the amount already due at placement. Cha-Ching. I mean, CHA-CHING! Such a blow. They were asking us (waiting faimilies) to prayerfully consider if we want to be shown to this couple and to let our case worker know by 11/26. Ty and I discussed it and we were so torn because we wanted to go for it, but the dollar signs are soemthing that we don't have. I don't even know who has that kind of cash. (If you do, please consider helping me out!)
After much prayer and even getting some prayer warriors involved, we wanted to go for it, and I really bad. I understood Ty's point because he said that he didn't want to go in debt, but I just couldn't think about passing up this "free" to at least go for it mind set. If we weren't selected, then that would be a closed door for sure. You see, we are children of God and serve a mighty, powerful Father who can move mountains and make miracles happen. Over the weekend we had prayerfully decided to go for this couple and have our profile book shown.
I didn't get a chance to call my Social Worker until the 21st. I emailed and sent a message to her on our portal and it kicked a message to me saying that she was out of town for Thanksgiving. Strike One. Then I called the Charlotte office and nobody answered so I left a message. Strike Two. A little while later, the precious adoption counselor called me and I loved our conversation. She said that this is part of the journey and H-U-G-E leaps of faith. Sometimes she said that you just have to jump. We were told that we couldn't ask any questions...but we did talk further about the case and she said that the BM was out of a different branch and that they didn't have a lot of profiles to show because of the extra money involved. That gave us a great hope. The counselor also said that it is possible that the cost wouldn't be that high if she was able to get things worked out. Was that a sign that God had already provided for us? She said that she would call the branch right now, done.
Over the remainder of the week, we were hopeful, scared, excited, and nervous. I would be lying if I said that I didn't look up how many weeks the BM was, thinking about "pink" things, and finally getting to say that we were placed. Also, she would get to wear my cousin Alli's hand-me-downs, and mom is set on the fact that she is going to have one of each grandchild. (Remember that my brother and his wife are due in May~and we all think that it is a boy.) It is a really freaky feeling to know that someone was going to be digging into our lives and deciding if we were "perfect" to them to raise their child. On Monday, I got some text messages curious to know if we had heard anything. I love my prayer warriors/family/friends.
I always keep my cell phone on my desk this year, you know, just in case. I checked my phone after lunch today and I saw that I had a message on my portal. I read that the BM looked at profiles yesterday and selected an adoptive couple, and they had already been notified. Reject, defeat, disappointment, sad. However, I had 22 first graders who need me to be on my toes and teach them to the best of my ability. One sweetheart waved her hand in front of me shortly after I read the message, because I was staring into space. Focus, Molli. I made it to the end of the day, and I was so proud because I haven't shed ONE tear! Yay, me. I called Ty and messaged a few family/friends. I love their kind words of encouragement. I stayed at school tonight until 6:10 and that helped too, I think. Ty and I went out to dinner and we talked about how we were sad, but yet glad to not have to get a loan for the pass through expenses.
As I have been taught: "God is either protecting you, or saving you for something better." I love my mom.
Maybe this chapter is turning into its own novel, sorry.
Mom called and said "we didn't nickname this baby Miracle for nothing" and I totally agree. That made me totally smile from ear to ear. We have to keep waiting on our Miracle to come from above. We have already waited eight years, officially in adoption world for almost a year, and we will continually wait and be so forever grateful for His blessing to our family.
Monday, November 12, 2012
God's little whispers of HOPE~
I wanted to let everyone know that you should clean your ears as often as you can. God will whisper things in your ear and tug at your heartstrings, which is what has happened lately.
We are just praying and waiting for birthparent selection.
A few weeks ago, we went to Louisville, KY for our nephew's wedding that was absolutely remarkable. It was by far the most spiritual wedding that I have ever been apart of. During their slide show one of the verses was whispered as a reminder of hope, because it is our adoption verse. Ephesians 3:20~it's on the cover of our profile book! Just a little touch of how our journey although on hold is still in the works.
Last weekend I had a girls day at the Holiday Market and one of the booths we passed was for Caroline's Promise. They were selling earrings and bags and I wanted to stop and talk with them, but they were busy. That was my first little whisper to remind me that they have grants out there for adoptive couples, once their home study is complete. Caroline's Promise is a Christian organization in Kernersville actually that gives $3,000 grants to Christian couples adopting domestically in NC/SC. So here we go with more paperwork, but hopefully it will be worth it.
The third whisper came last night at a concert at my church. The second band was called "The Sounds of Daniel Bashta" and his first song was good. I got up to go to the bathroom before the second song started. Bad mistake, or Satan one. We were sitting in the balcony and when I was getting ready to open the door, I heard the lead singer talking. I didn't want to disrupt by opening the door so I just stood in the doorway and listened as best as I could. What I missed was his testimony about their adoption journey which led to the song "Like a Lion." I only heard bits and pieces and when I sat back down, my friend was saying how cool that was, but that was all she said. After the amazing City Harmonic concert I came home and began investigating about writing the lyrics of a song. I found out they did a domestic adoption and now they are partnering with Bethany Christian Services (our agency). Then after further research, I found his wife's blog post and it totally moved me! I also found Project Gift through Christian Post Article. To me, this is a call and a cry out to promote the adoption plan for children in the US. Please download their song and think about making a donation. As I was home today from work, I decided to send the lead singer a private message on Facebook about last night and how it touched me. I hope that he will write me back!
My sister-in-law also messaged me today and said that she dreamed that "I was holding a baby ya'll just adopted and we were standing next to you congratulating us." She said that she couldn't tell when it was...but it was a sign from above. YAY!
Love whispers from the Great Planner!
We are just praying and waiting for birthparent selection.
A few weeks ago, we went to Louisville, KY for our nephew's wedding that was absolutely remarkable. It was by far the most spiritual wedding that I have ever been apart of. During their slide show one of the verses was whispered as a reminder of hope, because it is our adoption verse. Ephesians 3:20~it's on the cover of our profile book! Just a little touch of how our journey although on hold is still in the works.
Last weekend I had a girls day at the Holiday Market and one of the booths we passed was for Caroline's Promise. They were selling earrings and bags and I wanted to stop and talk with them, but they were busy. That was my first little whisper to remind me that they have grants out there for adoptive couples, once their home study is complete. Caroline's Promise is a Christian organization in Kernersville actually that gives $3,000 grants to Christian couples adopting domestically in NC/SC. So here we go with more paperwork, but hopefully it will be worth it.
The third whisper came last night at a concert at my church. The second band was called "The Sounds of Daniel Bashta" and his first song was good. I got up to go to the bathroom before the second song started. Bad mistake, or Satan one. We were sitting in the balcony and when I was getting ready to open the door, I heard the lead singer talking. I didn't want to disrupt by opening the door so I just stood in the doorway and listened as best as I could. What I missed was his testimony about their adoption journey which led to the song "Like a Lion." I only heard bits and pieces and when I sat back down, my friend was saying how cool that was, but that was all she said. After the amazing City Harmonic concert I came home and began investigating about writing the lyrics of a song. I found out they did a domestic adoption and now they are partnering with Bethany Christian Services (our agency). Then after further research, I found his wife's blog post and it totally moved me! I also found Project Gift through Christian Post Article. To me, this is a call and a cry out to promote the adoption plan for children in the US. Please download their song and think about making a donation. As I was home today from work, I decided to send the lead singer a private message on Facebook about last night and how it touched me. I hope that he will write me back!
My sister-in-law also messaged me today and said that she dreamed that "I was holding a baby ya'll just adopted and we were standing next to you congratulating us." She said that she couldn't tell when it was...but it was a sign from above. YAY!
Love whispers from the Great Planner!
Sunday, October 7, 2012
So MUCH!
I am SO behind on posting on the blog, and I hate that because so much has gone on in the past month!
First of all, on September 17th we got a very important letter from Bethany~! It was an approval letter saying that our home assessment had been approved and processed with the state director. In the letter it also mentioned that we are ready for the next step in our journey, birthparent selection :) and then hopefully placement! Just when we couldn't be any happier as we read the letter...the last sentence said that we have a bill of $3,500 due to cover the home study assessment. Man, so much of abusiness transaction process.
Next, we had dinner with friends of ours who are also adopting through Bethany. They are a super sweet couple who are just behind us in the adoption journey. It is so awesome to have another couple who are feeling the same feelings, going through the same frustations and emotions. Not to mention the excitement and fun as we long to complete our families.
Back tracking again, my "unofficial" grandmother also passed away from cancer. She was SO close to me and meant a lot to our family. It is my uncle's mother. People may think how can she be like my grandmother? Well, our family is extremly close and she would come to all of our family functions. Just a few days before she died, she told my aunt something that I will always treasure...She said that "when I get to heaven, I am going to ask God to send a baby miracle our way." Really, how priceless! I know she is sticking to her plan every day up there!
I also mailed our profile books to the three agencies: Arden, Charlotte, and Raleigh. As I waited in line at the post office, I prayed over these books, and for the hands that would hold them and choose an adoption plan for their child.
Lastly, on Wednesday of this past week I got an email saying that we can read over our home assessment and make any changes necessary. I read that 18 page monster the next day, made the changes, and clicked submit. On our portal, we found out that everything is good to go and ready for showing!
So now, as people ask "Have you heard anything?" we can officially say that we are "waiting on God to bring us together with a birthparent."
As always, prayers are appreciated as we await our miracle!
First of all, on September 17th we got a very important letter from Bethany~! It was an approval letter saying that our home assessment had been approved and processed with the state director. In the letter it also mentioned that we are ready for the next step in our journey, birthparent selection :) and then hopefully placement! Just when we couldn't be any happier as we read the letter...the last sentence said that we have a bill of $3,500 due to cover the home study assessment. Man, so much of a
Next, we had dinner with friends of ours who are also adopting through Bethany. They are a super sweet couple who are just behind us in the adoption journey. It is so awesome to have another couple who are feeling the same feelings, going through the same frustations and emotions. Not to mention the excitement and fun as we long to complete our families.
Back tracking again, my "unofficial" grandmother also passed away from cancer. She was SO close to me and meant a lot to our family. It is my uncle's mother. People may think how can she be like my grandmother? Well, our family is extremly close and she would come to all of our family functions. Just a few days before she died, she told my aunt something that I will always treasure...She said that "when I get to heaven, I am going to ask God to send a baby miracle our way." Really, how priceless! I know she is sticking to her plan every day up there!
I also mailed our profile books to the three agencies: Arden, Charlotte, and Raleigh. As I waited in line at the post office, I prayed over these books, and for the hands that would hold them and choose an adoption plan for their child.
Lastly, on Wednesday of this past week I got an email saying that we can read over our home assessment and make any changes necessary. I read that 18 page monster the next day, made the changes, and clicked submit. On our portal, we found out that everything is good to go and ready for showing!
So now, as people ask "Have you heard anything?" we can officially say that we are "waiting on God to bring us together with a birthparent."
As always, prayers are appreciated as we await our miracle!
Saturday, September 8, 2012
On the Way...
I bet that got your attention, huh? Well this title doesn't mean that we have a baby on the way...but that our four profile books are officially on their way from Snapfish! I was so excited to finally get the green light to order them. All we had to do was change the font to BOLD and shorten our wording on a page. I had originally ordered the first one we submitted, but I want an "official" one for Little Miracle to have as a keepsake so that when he/she is older, they can have a copy of the exact book that their birthparent used to select us. The books should be here any day...I will wait and track the shipping progress until it is at my doorstep.
On other news, our Home Study packet is sitting in the Arden (Asheville) office being approved by the head honcho there. Once she approves it, then we will be able to put our book and info at the three branches and wait!
A few Monday's ago, I had my heart sink to the bottom of my stomache when my case worker called about a possible placement for us!!!!! It was for a sibling pair, one 4 year old and newborn sisters. I unfortunately didn't get back to her until Thursday, but if I would have known exactly the circumstances of her call...then I would have been all over it. See, Ty and I have put in our preferences sheets that we want a Caucasian baby. However, this was for Hispanic children. I think that God is definitely tugging at our heart strings. Our case worker knew that we aren't looking for trans-racial placement, but she was told to call all of her parents...is that a sign? I mean, I don't want to accept just because it is the first opportunity...but wow. It really rocked my world! I mean this is the cultural shift in our area. I have a nursery all ready to go, but a 4 year old as well...man~
God has the perfect plan for us, and we are anxiously awaiting becoming a forever family with a Little Miracle...or two?!
On other news, our Home Study packet is sitting in the Arden (Asheville) office being approved by the head honcho there. Once she approves it, then we will be able to put our book and info at the three branches and wait!
A few Monday's ago, I had my heart sink to the bottom of my stomache when my case worker called about a possible placement for us!!!!! It was for a sibling pair, one 4 year old and newborn sisters. I unfortunately didn't get back to her until Thursday, but if I would have known exactly the circumstances of her call...then I would have been all over it. See, Ty and I have put in our preferences sheets that we want a Caucasian baby. However, this was for Hispanic children. I think that God is definitely tugging at our heart strings. Our case worker knew that we aren't looking for trans-racial placement, but she was told to call all of her parents...is that a sign? I mean, I don't want to accept just because it is the first opportunity...but wow. It really rocked my world! I mean this is the cultural shift in our area. I have a nursery all ready to go, but a 4 year old as well...man~
God has the perfect plan for us, and we are anxiously awaiting becoming a forever family with a Little Miracle...or two?!
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Profile Book~
Well, I finished up the challenging profile book and we were so happy with how it turned out! We had to order only one so that it could be approved and then we will keep that one as a keepsake. Remember that this is the book that potential birthparents will look through to select us. As people ask about how things are going, they are surprised to find out that we are birthparent selected. I love it!
When our case worker reviewed it, she did mention that the background design we chose might be distracting. I had to be front with her...we don't want to change it. We think it tells more about our personalities. We are not solid colored people :) Of course, we will do what she says...but we will see. We are in the process of setting up a review session. We had several people read through everything and nobody mentioned the background as a distraction.
On another note, our Home Study assessment has been completed for several weeks and she should finish typing everything up...hopefully soon :) No rush, not!
The highlight of the month so far has bee my principal asking me if I have thought about who would do my long term sub leave when Little Miracle comes. EEP! A retired teacher from my school actually mentioned to me that she would be interested...so we talked and she is a GO! I hated not to be able to tell her a tentative date...but she didn't seem to mind. I told her the other day that she has certainly become an important person in this process. Yippee~one day it will happen. Stay calm, my heart.
When our case worker reviewed it, she did mention that the background design we chose might be distracting. I had to be front with her...we don't want to change it. We think it tells more about our personalities. We are not solid colored people :) Of course, we will do what she says...but we will see. We are in the process of setting up a review session. We had several people read through everything and nobody mentioned the background as a distraction.
On another note, our Home Study assessment has been completed for several weeks and she should finish typing everything up...hopefully soon :) No rush, not!
The highlight of the month so far has bee my principal asking me if I have thought about who would do my long term sub leave when Little Miracle comes. EEP! A retired teacher from my school actually mentioned to me that she would be interested...so we talked and she is a GO! I hated not to be able to tell her a tentative date...but she didn't seem to mind. I told her the other day that she has certainly become an important person in this process. Yippee~one day it will happen. Stay calm, my heart.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Can't believe it...
has been so long since I last updated the blog!
Tons have been going on, but I will start with our final home study meeting. I cleaned the house and took Meredith's advice and didn't worry about cleaning out the cabinets~but I did clean out all the rest of the closets that seemed to have been neglected. Not to alarm you, but we have handguns in our house. They are Ty's toys, and I knew that we needed to have a safe for them. Well we didn't get one. My case worker messaged me and said that we also needed "all other safety devices." I immediately went frantic over what that meant. I didn't know if I needed outlet covers, door knob grippers, and all that stuff that comes when baby gets mobile. I didn't want anything to not be perfect, but I came to the conclusion that I wasn't going out and getting that stuff then. We did get a fire extinguisher though. That just seemed to push me over the edge. I was tired, done, and decided that I was washing my hands of everything that we had done to prepare for this. The meeting and inspection went really smooth. She asked us final questions that she need clarifying, discussed the interim house from previous meeting, and then the biggie preferences sheet came up. This was a CRAZY set of papers. We had to select YES/NO/WILL CONSIDER on many types of things. We like to say that we are open and we are, but we are firm on a few areas. It doesn't mean that we are picky, racists, or unwilling parents nor are we looking for the perfect child. God has the perfect child to fit into our family, perfectly, forever. We have surveyed, prayed, completed activities, and discussed all of our characteristics. Here are some of the areas that were on the sheets: multiples, gender, transracial, personality disorders in birthmom/father/extended family, blindness, hearing impairment, LD in family, mental disorders in family, rape, incest, HIV, STDS, physical impairments in child...and the list goes on and on. I mean wow, this was intense. Then we had to put on paper about how often we want birthparents to visit, have a part in naming, where visits will take place, etc. We got through it and then we showed our case worker our profile book that we (mostly I) worked on. She wanted us to change several things, about it being to "wordy." She said that people don't really read now and just are looking for a quick snapshot-something that will catch his/her eye.
Our caseworker had to go out of town and we did too, and so she will be coming back by to look at our cable locks for the guns and to pick up the profile book. We made ours through Snapfish. She will take it to the CLT office and then if everything is good, then we will order three more to keep in the branches.
After that, we will OFFICIALLY be able to be seen by potential birthparents!!!!! I can't believe it.
The box from Snapfish can't come fast enough!
Tons have been going on, but I will start with our final home study meeting. I cleaned the house and took Meredith's advice and didn't worry about cleaning out the cabinets~but I did clean out all the rest of the closets that seemed to have been neglected. Not to alarm you, but we have handguns in our house. They are Ty's toys, and I knew that we needed to have a safe for them. Well we didn't get one. My case worker messaged me and said that we also needed "all other safety devices." I immediately went frantic over what that meant. I didn't know if I needed outlet covers, door knob grippers, and all that stuff that comes when baby gets mobile. I didn't want anything to not be perfect, but I came to the conclusion that I wasn't going out and getting that stuff then. We did get a fire extinguisher though. That just seemed to push me over the edge. I was tired, done, and decided that I was washing my hands of everything that we had done to prepare for this. The meeting and inspection went really smooth. She asked us final questions that she need clarifying, discussed the interim house from previous meeting, and then the biggie preferences sheet came up. This was a CRAZY set of papers. We had to select YES/NO/WILL CONSIDER on many types of things. We like to say that we are open and we are, but we are firm on a few areas. It doesn't mean that we are picky, racists, or unwilling parents nor are we looking for the perfect child. God has the perfect child to fit into our family, perfectly, forever. We have surveyed, prayed, completed activities, and discussed all of our characteristics. Here are some of the areas that were on the sheets: multiples, gender, transracial, personality disorders in birthmom/father/extended family, blindness, hearing impairment, LD in family, mental disorders in family, rape, incest, HIV, STDS, physical impairments in child...and the list goes on and on. I mean wow, this was intense. Then we had to put on paper about how often we want birthparents to visit, have a part in naming, where visits will take place, etc. We got through it and then we showed our case worker our profile book that we (mostly I) worked on. She wanted us to change several things, about it being to "wordy." She said that people don't really read now and just are looking for a quick snapshot-something that will catch his/her eye.
Our caseworker had to go out of town and we did too, and so she will be coming back by to look at our cable locks for the guns and to pick up the profile book. We made ours through Snapfish. She will take it to the CLT office and then if everything is good, then we will order three more to keep in the branches.
After that, we will OFFICIALLY be able to be seen by potential birthparents!!!!! I can't believe it.
The box from Snapfish can't come fast enough!
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